


Spend Your Life Letting People Down

by VSSAKJ



Category: Tales of Symphonia
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-17
Updated: 2015-04-17
Packaged: 2018-03-23 09:31:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3763069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VSSAKJ/pseuds/VSSAKJ
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the prompt: Kratos/Zelos, "things you never said at all".</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spend Your Life Letting People Down

**Author's Note:**

> There is no ship unless you really, really want it. Absolutely partially inspired by this: http://shinigamiwyvern.tumblr.com/post/83787195266/.

“Is that my cute little Colette? What are you doing up by yourself at this hour?” Nevermind why Zelos was wandering the halls with tousled hair and a loosely-sashed silk robe as his only clothing. No, the concern was for Colette, barefoot and nightgowned, standing on a communal balcony with her gaze skyward and forearms pimpled with gooseflesh.

At Zelos’s words, though, she turned to him and smiled apologetically, “Oh, Zelos. I’m sorry I woke you.”

“Forget about it! I was up anyway, and any time I get to spend with my darling Colette is valuable time.” Noting the expression on her face, he waited a beat, then repeated, “So what are you doing?”

Colette blushed. “I was just counting stars. I couldn’t sleep. Altamira is so pretty. It’s a really amazing place, isn’t it? We don’t have anything like this in Sylvarant.”

“You couldn’t, not with the mana being like it is.” Zelos agreed, leaning on the balustrade beside her. He set his gaze upon the twinkling night sky, visible beyond the influence of Altamira’s night life. Silence stretched between them, punctuated by the occasional cresting evidence of the crowds far below.

Colette’s voice rose, tiny. “Zelos?”

“Hm?” He looked her way, prepared to flash a smile but stifling it when he saw her struggling to keep her composure.

“I don’t know why, but it makes me sad. There are so many things about my journey I can’t remember from before Lloyd made my Key Crest. I can’t remember what it was like to not need to eat, or to not feel hot and cold.” Her voice dropped to a whisper, both frustrated and distant, “But I can remember what it was like when I couldn’t sleep. Kratos used to stare at the fire for hours. He saw me trying to sleep, and told me to count stars instead, because it was something to help keep my mind busy and pass the time. Because I couldn’t sleep. He didn’t tell anyone about me.”

“And he took you away to kill you, Colette.” Zelos found himself surly and hardened, uncomfortably startled by his own memories of the old man. Without keeping the scathing from his tone, he demanded, “How can you be grateful to him for anything?”

Colette frowned. “I know he’s done bad things. I just think he’s done some good things too. He helped me a lot, so I have to be thankful for that, even if he did other things.”

In that moment, Zelos wanted to hate her. He wanted to tell her that he watched the damn old man count fucking stars for nights and nights and nights and never heard a word of advice for his own insomnia. He wanted to tell her that the old man had waited out the throes of his digesting aionis and said nothing. He wanted to tell her that he’d gone looking for stars to count in womens’ eyes, because nights dragged on too long alone and no one offered him any other solutions.

He wanted to tell her that Kratos had spent his whole damnably long life letting people down.

He sighed, and looked away again, as Colette rubbed her eyes. “If we were all like you, Colette, maybe the world would be worth saving.”

“Huh? What do you mean, Zelos?”

“Nothing, Colette.” He smiled, a grim expression, and turned away from her, mood as overcast as midnight.


End file.
